Saturday, December 11, 2010

Joint parties... maybe not the best idea

My lil man is going to be 5 years old in just 10 days. Wow... I still can't believe he is going to be such a big boy! Where did the time fly?

Well, my ex and I decided that we were going to have a joint birthday party. We figured that since we were able to get along, our families should be able to commingle. Well, it was at his home (which used to be our home) and I was alright with that.

Let me start off with I am already an emotional wreck and have been for about a week now. So, the start of my day was terrible to begin with because I had so many things holding me up to get to the house to help prepare. By the time I did get there, everything was done. I lost it, break down of tears #1. I didn't decorate, I didn't cook, I did nothing. I was disgusted with myself.

I leave to go and pick up the cake and some balloons, and the moment I get in my car, I lose it again, break down of tears #2. I cry the whole way to the store, sobbing like a fool to my wonderful sis(inlaw). I go in get the few things left to get and get a call from my mom, asking how I was holding up. I start telling her how upset I am and that today is going to be tough, break down #3.

I clean my face get the cake and hit the road. Ok, I think... I have this out of my system now. I will be fine from here out.

I get back... waiting around for people to come. Damn it... must run to powder room for break down #4. OKAY! Now I have to be alright. People are coming! My mom gets there takes one look at me and just hugs me.

Ok, more people arrive... My ex's father... and his Aunt, and a few of his other relatives. What do you think happened next... Oh, well the ignorant individuals treated me as though I was non-existent. Yes, you read that correctly! They didn't even speak to me. After everything I have ever done for these people. The love I have given them and their family. I wasn't the one cheating!

Well, you guessed it break down #5. Outside I went. Better, in I went... to be told that MY dad called my ex to let him know he was going to be late. MY dad... sorry... yup break down #6. Now, I am just getting annoyed that I have cried so much in one day.

Well... fast forward and I will just say I cried about 4 or 5 more times. Over stupid shit, too!

I am just in shock over the way I was treated. I have never been so rude to people in my life. These were people I called my family! So.... the next few weeks and the holiday's are not going to be easy for me.

I am drinking entirely too much coffee and going to clean my house to prepare for being with my babies again!